


My Life Is One Big Stage

by kiaroseuchiha



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: F/M, M/M, romance supernatural you wolf exo kai wolfau">
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-26
Updated: 2015-08-06
Packaged: 2018-03-25 20:40:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 21,090
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3824383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kiaroseuchiha/pseuds/kiaroseuchiha
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jongin had been told all through his childhood that when he grew up he would find his mate, bite her and that would be the end of it. No-one told him that it would be this difficult, that there would be resistance.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Of early mornings, sandwich presses and false information

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me!!!” You screech throwing the covers off yourself before proceeding to wrench open your door to glare at your drunken roommates hanging out in front of your room. 

“Guys it’s like 2:30am, I’m trying to sleep! I’ve already asked you twice to be quiet, now please! Tone it down or take it somewhere else! You always seem to stop and talk right in front of my doorway; it’s starting to drive me batty!!”

Most of the chatter dies down, and several of your roommates send you guilty grimaces before picking themselves up off the floor. “Sorry Jess, we didn’t realise we were that loud” Mel, ever the most sober one of the group apologises.

“Its fine Mel, I’m just in a bad mood and all I want to do is sleep. I’ll see you tomorrow” without waiting for a reply, you shut the door, flipping the latch to lock it.

The bed still retained most of your body heat and it is easy to slide back under the covers and get comfy, however, now you’re wide awake. Your brain mulls over random things as you try to force yourself back to sleep. Giving up with a whine of frustration, you blindly fumble for your phone, squinting when the harsh backlight of the phone hits you full force. 2:35 Am. Less than four hours left of sleep before you have to be up to take Jen to Placement. 

Great.

After checking Facebook and Instagram for any updates, you finally cull the phone light with a yawn, snuggling back down into the comforter, sleep claiming you not long after.

 

 

Owlish eyes blink back blearily at you as Jen settles herself into the small car. “Morning Jen, sleep well?” a yawn is the only answer you receive, “I’ll take that as a no then”.

“Hey soz jess, I stayed up trying to get my assignment done and I literally haven’t got anywhere with it! Ugh it’s so stressful!”

You give her a pitying smile as you back out of Jen’s apartment parking lot. Jen’s workload is certainly something you don’t envy. You’ve only known her for almost a year now, ever since she moved to your town with her sister. It was awkward at first but once she started UNI you felt a growing fondness for her. Jen is absolutely swamped in her too big coat, shivering from the morning breeze and you feel bad for her as you know her aversion to the cold, just like she knows you’re aversion to the heat. To be quite honest, anyone who knows you knows about your hate of the summer months, it’s a time where everyone is very much aware of your temper.

You blink back out of your subconsciousness only to realise that the Korean girl has been asking you about something, you grin sheepishly “sorry Jen, I was off with the fairies again”.

Jen laughs, “I figured, especially after I said that Tony Abbot was going to ban the eating of chicken and I didn’t even get a reaction out of you.”

You growl, “No-one touches my chicken! I’ll cut their head off!”

“Wo-oah! Clam down, too early for that!”

You’re still laughing as you pull up outside the nursing home, “Here you go my lovely! Have a good day and work hard!”

Jen’s gathering her things and stretching out of the car, turning to look back inside the vehicle “I’ll try; I’m stuck with that Bogan woman again. She’s so mean to the old people and there’s nothing I can do about it, I’m only a first year”.

Jen’s in her first year of nursing and she is constantly going on placements, this sessions one being a 3 week placement in a nursing home. Honestly, Jen’s so cute and she has a heart of gold and you can see how it really affects her when she sees how the nurses treat the elderly. Yesterday she got into your car absolutely devastated over the fact that two nurses where joking around and placed a sheet over an old ladies face and left it there for a few seconds before properly tucking her into bed. She was sobbing before you dropped her off at her unit.

You bid Jen farewell, waiting to make sure she gets into the building safe and sound, before pulling out of the complex, winding your way back onto the highway.  
To gym it or not? You think to yourself before quickly deciding no, you would rather go out to university early and actually get some work done before Phoebe arrived. Phoebe was the only friend in your course at UNI and you absolutely loved hanging out with her outside of UNI, however actually having to try and study with her was a whole other ball game. Most of the times when you two arranged to study (i.e. every day to keep on top of your assignments and distance education classes) she talked your ear off for about an hour before any proper work was done and even then you were still interrupted by random outbursts. You weren’t completely innocent at all in this matter, you also start conversations and sustain them until well past lunch time. The real issue you had with this was just that you listened to Phoebe and her issues without interrupting but never really received the same treatment from your friend. Sure she listens to you when you really need her and gives you encouragement and support but she had a really irritating habit of turning your conversation into one about herself and comparing her life to yours. 

Irritating.

Ordering an extra-large coffee (because your university was too stupid to tell the difference between a regular and a large, hence the stuffed up sizing), you quickly nab the best study group booth, the one with the windows.

2 and half hours later, not long after you’ve finished your module for the week, Phoebe walks into the room, sporting a McDonald’s coffee, laptop bag in tow. She grins when she sees you and you smile back.

“Haro! Been here long?” she asks as she settles herself into the white plastic seat opposite you.

You lie with a smile, swigging on your coffee dregs that turned cold long ago. “No, just sat down actually”.

 

Lunchtime creeps up pretty quickly, due to Phoebe’s incessant chatter, and you’re really glad that you came early because you’ve managed to get fuck all done since she arrived. Leaving your stuff where it is, you break for lunch, heading out to the main eating area to toast your sandwiches (The canteen ones at university are too goddamn expensive! It’s ridiculous!). Phoebe grabs your attention with a quick nudge to the shoulder and you look at her before noticing her attention is on the massive plasma TV situated on the main wall and it is at this point that you notice all the students’ have gone oddly quiet.

“And in other headlines, an update on the aforementioned supernatural epidemic”

You scoff and turn back to your sandwich knowing exactly where this is going. As much as you try to ignore the images you can still hear the news reporter. Even if you couldn’t hear, Phoebe would probably bring it up for discussion later anyway.

“New reports are coming in from all over the world of citizens claiming to be a part of this discovery of supernatural beings, but most are being proven to be false and only hinder further research into the matter. We cross live to Jake Wallman who is currently in Queensland. What are the reports from Queensland Jake?”

The TV splits into two screens, one showing Dianne smith in the studio and the other Jake Wallman, who is standing in front a massive crowd. “Yes Dianne, as you can imagine the situation is the same all over the world and as the news of this new species of humans (someone snorts in the background which is followed by a round of jeering) emerges, more false cases are being reported than actual discoveries”

It’s at this point that a stranger walks into the camera frame claiming “I’m not a fake! How dare you insult my people like this!”

The reporter looks shocked and slightly frightened as he turns to address this new person “I’m sorry sir; I didn’t mean to offend anyone. I’m assuming you belong to the group of the gifted? What is your name?” reaching over so his mic is directly below the strangers mouth, ready to catch his reply.

A hushed silence falls over the common area, people anxiously waiting to see how the ‘gifted’ stranger will react.

The stranger levels reporter Wallman with a menacing glare. “My name is James Furry and yes I am indeed part of the gifted group!” there are a few murmurs as the reporter hushes the crowd, eager to hear more, “and in fact I’m so gifted, I’m one of the elite! I eat meat straight from the carcass and every full moon I get naked and turn into a tiny ferocious puppy who eats virgins hearts!” as the guy finishes his outburst he proceeds to imitate a wolfs howling which soon gets choked off by his own laughter. Jake Wallman, realising that he just got fooled by a complete idiot, glares and walks off with his microphone, camera crew following.

“Well there you have it Dianne, as you can see, this discovery has turned half the population into giant wolves and the other half into bumbling idiots” after a beat he composes his face into a sickly sweet smile “Back to you Dianne”.

“Wow, what the hell was that?” Phoebe muses as she follows after you back into the study room.

“That, was an idiot getting fooled by an even bigger idiot”

Phoebe looks insulted “How is Jake Wallman an idiot? He’s a fantastic news reporter who always does his job to the best of his abilities to make sure we know everything that is going on in our country. He was just doing his job; it’s not his fault that guy lied!”

“Phoebs… James Furry… you should have known just by that that he was pulling the reporter’s leg. It was obvious; people are just making it into a big joke.”

She’s silent for a while, contemplating what you’ve just said before she opens her mouth to respond, “All the same, it wasn’t Jake’s fault”.

You roll your eyes for the 50000th time that month, Phoebe absolutely adored Jake Wallman, and to her, the sun literally shone out of his arse. “If I didn’t know you were married Phoebs, I’d say you were infatuated with Mr Wallman”, you tease.

Phoebe flushes right up to the tips of her ears, stammering “Don’t be absurd Jessica, I love my husband. I’m just appreciating someone who is good at his job, that is all”.  
“Lol its ok dude, I know you love Henry, it was just mucking around”

She flushes even brighter before putting her head down, mumbling something along the lines of ‘of course I knew you were joking’ and ‘we need to stop talking so we can actually get some work done today’.

You laugh one last time, watching her write out the answers to the module before continuing to watch running man on your laptop.


	2. Of stares and idiot classmates

“Omg Jess I wasn’t meaning to be rude! I just wanted to make sure you were being careful!” Phoebe exclaims as she darts after you, pushing her way through the rushing students.

You’re not in a good mood. All Phoebe has done for weeks is go on and on about the ‘werewolf issue’ and you politely listened to her rambling. But this morning, she had crossed the line.

She pulls on your arm as she finally catches up to you and you reluctantly turn to face her, “I didn’t mean to insult your friends, the majority of your friends, I was just warning you about what Jake said this morning. For some reason most of the um… things? (Werewolves) are reported to be Korean! Whether that’s because Koreans’ are more likely or that their system of reporting is much more efficient than ours, doesn’t matter. What does matter is that you spend all your free time with Koreans’ and half of them you don’t even know! I care about you; you’re like my best friend! Why is that such a bad thing?!”

You heave out a big sigh and feel your once dull headache bloom into a full throbbing migraine, you’ve had it for at least a week and it’s still not going away. “I know Phoebs, thank you for caring so much about me but I am fine, I am safe. None of my friends are going to hurt me, just like you wouldn’t. I’m sorry I got mad, my head is just fucking killing me and we are now almost certainly late to class.”

She nods, still looking sullen but now she has a somewhat hopeful, happy glimmer to her eyes now that you’re not so angry with her anymore. When you moved to UNI, you moved into the student block with your friend Amy who was a couple of years older than you. Amy was just one of those people that was friends with everyone and just drifted from group to group and that’s how she found the Korean congregation, and that was how you were able to settle in quite comfortably into your new life. You loved the culture, the language and the food and it was awesome to learn about a culture that was different to yours. Honestly, you felt more comfortable and accepted in the group of families than you ever had back home, they genuinely cared about everyone and was always willing to help anyone in need. Grace had even started telling all the newcomers that you were her ‘first daughter’, her Australian daughter, which made your heart bloom with love and pride every time she would fold you into one of her hugs. One of the few good things that you took from your relationship with your ex was that you saw Grace almost every day and became really close. Always gotta look for the positive jess!

Your lecturer side-eyes you both as you slide into your seats at the back of the room, a few of the other students smirking at ‘the overachievers’ for being late. There was a reason that you and Phoebe never associated with the others, one, they partied all the time and left things to the last minute and two, they blamed your academic success on their failure, how that even correlates you don’t even know, but they seem to think that the lecturers liking you was the reason you always got the better marks. Yes, because actually doing your assignment and submitting it on time has nothing to do with it. Idiots.

Halfway through the lecture, you start to feel a sense of unease and you headache seems to get worse, if that was even possible. Silently excusing yourself, you drag your feet outside for some fresh air and to fill up your water bottle. You’re about to leave and walk back down the hallway when you back up and turn around straight into a wall of flesh. You apologise profusely before making your way back to class, curious eyes following after you.

“How was your walk?” Phoebe whispers as you resituate yourself at your desk.

You snort, “Short, and awkward. I accidentally walked straight into this guy, so I said sorry and left; I wasn’t going to stick around Lol.”

She tries to hide her giggles behind her hand, her square, oversized engagement ring catching your attention as she flutters her fingers. “Of course that would happen. Just be thankful it was a guy and not a brick wall”

“Hey! I have never run into a brick wall, Sasha was the one who walked into the glass door!” you protest.

“Ladies,” your lecturer had eventually given up on pretending to ignore your separate conversation has now halted class to watch you two. “Anything you would like to share?”

“Come on girls, I’m here trying to learn, think about your future. I have to get good grades and you’re affecting my learning!” Scott pipes up sarcastically from across the room.

“Haha Scott you’re so funny,” you smile sickly sweet at him before focussing your attention on the lecturer, “Sorry Lincoln, I was just telling Phoebe about something that happened on the weekend. It won’t happen again”.

Lincoln nods slightly in your direction, “Save that for outside of class time please”.

Everyone settles in and you’re taking a swig from your drink bottle when your eyes flicker to the doorway and make contact with the stranger’s eyes staring directly at you. Phoebe makes a disgruntled noise as you spit water over the page she is currently writing on, “What the fuck Jess!” but you shush her and prevent her from turning around to see what caused such a reaction from you. 

You lower your head closer to hers, trying to be discreet “that guy I bumped into at the bubbler? He’s standing in the freaking doorway staring at us, No don’t look!!!!!” you prevent her as she attempts to swivel round in her seat.

Your head rises slightly so you can see over the top of Phoebe’s head and sure enough, creepy guy is still doing his creepy staring thing! “Why the hell is he staring?”

“Did you apologise when you bumped into him?” she asks.

“Of course I did! But why is he here?” you internally panic, trying to think of all the possible things that you could have done. Maybe he didn’t hear you apologise? Taking another quick peek at him the thought of ‘maybe he didn’t understand what I said’ crosses your mind as you take in his Asian ethnicity. You scratch that thought because that was a stupid idea; everyone understands the word ‘sorry’. You break out of your internal rambling to discover that the guy has actually stepped into the room, not once dropping his gaze on you. 

You yell.

“Seriously what the hell dude?! I’m sorry okay?” everyone looks confused at your outburst, most trying to figure out what you’re doing.

Lincoln clears his throat, “Jessica do you think it would be best if you took a little break and come back when you’re more settled down?” he asks exasperatedly.

You shake your head furiously, no way in hell are you leaving the classroom by yourself when that guy is standing right there. Speaking of which. “I’m so sorry, I’m not doing it on purpose but it’s hard to concentrate when he’s standing there being creepy!”

“Who?” Lincoln asks and follows your outstretched hand to the empty doorway.

Fuck. ”I swear to god, there was a guy there staring at me and it was creepy” you explain, “He must have ran away when I yelled”.

Lincoln sighs obviously over all the random outbursts occurring during his class, “get up and shut the door, that way if he comes back you won’t be able to see him and hopefully I can continue to teach in peace”.

Ashamed that you’ve made Lincoln upset with you, you rise out of you chair to do as his says. You shift the cement block out of the way to let the door fall back into place against its frame. You stare back into the same black eyes watching you from the pillar outside the doorway, contact being cut off when the door swings shut with a bang.

“Did you think about asking him why he was staring?” Jen questions as you’re driving her home. “I mean it could be something so simple, maybe you dropped something and he was just trying to get your attention so he could give it back to you?”

Rubbing at your temple with your free hand, you shrug your shoulders, “I have no idea and seriously after that episode I don’t even want to know what he has to say to me, it was beyond creepy and he wasn’t even fazed by the fact that I caught him staring! He just kept on looking!”

“Maybe he though you’re attractive?”

You bark out a ‘Ha’, “He was more likely staring at one of the other girls then.”

“Jessica~”

“Nope!” you cut her off, “end of discussion. How was work?” you change the subject.

Jen sighs before breaking off into a rant about the Bogan woman she was stuck with again all day.

“Maybe you should try speaking Korean to him?”

So we’re back to this again… “Why?”

“You said he was Asian, maybe he’s Korean? I don’t know try say something and see if he responds then, if he is Korean, and you need any help I can translate a couple of things for you.” Jen suggests.

“Yea that’d be great, how do you say stop staring at me or I’ll kick your teeth in?”

 

The next day is the exact same as it was the day before. And the day before that, and the day before that. In fact, ever since last week it’s been the same. Stares. However they’ve gone from the intimidating stares from that day in Lincoln’s class, to more curious stares. It’s sad that you’re slowly getting used to your shadows. Yes, Plural.

It seems that ‘Tall, Dark and Handsome’ (as you’ve decided to call him) has informed his friends of his little game as you now have 3 more sets of staring eyes watching your every move.

“I think it’s flattering” Phoebe states and she scraps her sandwich off the press.

“You were only just saying 2 days ago how it was creepy beyond all hell and that I should go report them” you counter. 

At this point you really don’t give a crap. Let them stare. They can take a goddamn picture if they want to, it’ll last longer.

You go to walk away but Phoebe stays rooted to her spot beside the microwave, gaze fixated on the flat screen.

“Recent studies has shown that the ‘gifted’ are more like wolves than we originally thought”

Seriously. You’re over it and all you want to do is go back and work on your Art assignment but Phoebe seems hell bent on staying. You’re tempted to walk off on her but cringe and think better of that idea when you think of the consequences. She would get annoyed and no one wants to deal with a shitty Phoebe.

You’re staring off into space, not fully taking in the news report, when your eyes lock onto Tall, Dark and Handsome. He’s leaning against the wall at the back of the room, cronies matching the same closed off posture beside him. He’s wearing jeans and a simple black top with his hair all fluffy and soft, making him look rather boyish. You’ve figure by now that if he’s allowed to scrutinize you then what forbids you from assessing him. Once your eyes have skated over his tan hands, holy fuck they’re huge, you rest on his face. He usually has a neutral face when ogling so it takes you by surprise when he sends you a little smile, you almost don’t see it, but it was definitely there.

Phoebe gasps beside you, “You can’t be serious!” and that’s when you finally listen to the news reporter.

“…wolf-like patterns. The amount of human/’gifted’ relationships that are occurring is astonishing! People who have never met are suddenly infatuated with each other and claiming to have found ‘the one’. Some scientists are suggesting some sort of mind control is at play here… ”

Phoebe stares at you in horror. Well that is a new development. Having had enough, you drag your friend away from the canteen and down the corridor, ignoring the way all four sets of eyes bore holes into the back of your head.


	3. Teeth

Dragging yourself out of bed, the first thing you do is pop a couple of painkillers. Your head feels like it’s about to split in two and to make matters worse, when you go to the bathroom you discover that you’ve just got your periods. After cleaning up, you warm up your heat pack and head back to the bathroom, feeling nauseous. You lock yourself in the first toilet cuticle, gingerly settling yourself down onto the cool tiles. Placing the heat pack against your abdomen you curl up. Your head lolls back onto the tiled wall, the chill helping your headache.

You wake up a couple of hours later to Mel banging on the door “Hurry up I need to pee!”

Blinking the sleep out of your eyes you lean up onto your knees snatching the heat pack up from the floor. You unlatch the door. “Sorry Mel, I wasn’t feeling well and I guess I fell asleep in here”

“Wow you look really sick! Have you got any painkillers? I’ve got some in my room if you want them?”

You nod your head, pain streaking as you do so. “Yes please, I’ve run out”.

After dropping Jen off to work (thank god she started later today), you head out to UNI and slump down into one of the padded orange booths, nursing your cramping stomach. Phoebe arrives after a while of you accomplishing nothing but wasting time.

She looks at you in concern. “Are you ok? You don’t look to crash hot”

“Yea I’m fine, just my girlies. It’ll be over in a couple of days. I just wish this goddamn headache would go away!” you grit out.

“Maybe go get it checked out? It’s been going on for a while now”

You sit up slowly shaking your head, “nah I’m sure it’s nothing, it’ll pass”

She lets you go, knowing not to force you to do something you don’t want to and you’re grateful to her. The rest of the morning drags on and on and nothing eventful happens until right when you’re starting to get into your study.

“Pssst!” you look up and give Phoebe a strange look as she leans closer across the table while still trying to appear inconspicuous. It doesn’t work.

“Your stalker just sat down behind you. Both him and his gang are staring”

You sigh in defeat and put your head back down, intending on ignoring them.

“Like seriously staring, they haven’t even got their books out to study”

“Thanks Phoebe but I don’t really care whether they’re studying or not, I’m more concerned about getting my study done”.

She pouts at you, obviously not getting the reaction she wanted out of you. “Sorry, just thought you should know”

You smile at her politely. “Thanks Phoebs”

 

You’re mulling over which art movement Charles Rennie Mackintosh actually belonged to when Phoebe nudges your foot. You look up at her, eyebrow arched in question.

“He looks pretty hot today. Like you know, I like Australian men better but he really does look good today.”

You stare at her with a WTF face; seriously, it was these types of stupid random outburst that really pissed you off. “Well why don’t you go and talk to him, maybe he’ll take his eyes off me and we’ll all be happy” you spit.

“don’t be silly Jessica, I’m married in case you forgot,” who could when she’s always going on about it, “I’m just saying that maybe you should see what is going on, what’s stopping you? It’s been over a year since David...”

“I’m Hungry” you announce standing up and grabbing your wallet out of your backpack. “I’ll be back”

You take off round the corner without waiting for a reply and head to the canteen, dodging other hungry students. David was your ex Korean boyfriend and you were over him by now, all you wanted was the money back that he owed you, but everyone seemed to think you were still hung up on him. They never brought him up in conversation and when you were telling a story that involved him they would get all awkward as if they were the ones that had their arses dumped. They seriously acted more affected by the situation than you did. Deciding on a fruit cup full of watermelon seeing as you didn’t think your stomach could handle anything heavier; you pay for it and weave back to your booth.  
Phoebe says nothing as you open up your laptop and plug your earphones in, flicking through YouTube before clicking on a random hair tutorial. You see in the reflection of the laptop screen that the table behind you is empty.

 

 

“You look like shit” your lab partner chuckles as you slump down at the bench.

“Thank you for reminding me for the 5th time today” you mumble into the bench top.

He pats your back supportively before pulling out his prac manual. “Do you want me to go ahead and start while you take it easy for a bit?”

You eye him suspiciously, squinting “I’m trying to work out whether or not you’re actually concerned or whether you’re being sarcastic and will use this as blackmail later.”

He laughs joyfully and doesn’t give you a response as he walks to the front of the lab to get the required glassware for today’s prac. Flicking through the pages, you find out that you’re meant to be making jam which will be used later when working out the pH and water activity and whether or not you have produced it properly to prevent microbial growth. Sounds easy enough, I think.

Luhan comes back with his arms full of several types of glassware looking like it’s about to tumble out of his arms at any moment. You rush over to help him unload it onto the bench. “Seriously dude, we have trolleys designed for this reason, not to break shit”

“Ooooooh, I’ve always wondered what they were for”

You snort at his sarcastic response and start setting up the tripod stand and burner. “So how was your weekend?”

He grins “It was great! Kris and I went to the beach; surprisingly it wasn’t as cold as I thought it would be”

Kris. Luhan’s Canadian boyfriend. Well, Chinese/Korean/Canadian boyfriend. It hurt your head sometimes just thinking about what nationality he was. “Oh yeah, that sounds nice. What else did you do?”

It’s at this point that Luhan flushes bright pink before dropping the vial in his hands. You quickly snatch it up, internally cheering at your awesome save before facing your still flushing friend.

He grins at you sheepishly “N-nothing much, just uh, couple stuff” before flushing even brighter (if that was even possible).

You raise your eyebrows up and down at him quickly giving him a thumbs up. He elbows you in embarrassment, busying himself setting up the rest of the apparatus. It made you happy seeing his obviously smitten face whenever his boyfriend was brought up. It had you feeling all warm and fuzzy over the fact that he trusted you enough to tell you about his relationship even though he’d only transferred to your university a little over 2 months ago. He was shocked when you didn’t even bat an eyelash after he told you about his boyfriend, the only response you could come up with to his shock was ‘we’re living in the first century dude’.

You continued to work in silence, your teamwork needing no words as you adjusted things here and there. You could see him looking at you, obviously wanting to say something but not confident enough to break the silence.

You put him out of his misery by turning to him and raising one brow. “Yes?”

He laughs at being caught, shaking his head trying to pass it off casually. “Nothing. Just wanted to know what’s been happening on your end? Haven’t seen you in two weeks, surely something interesting has happened? Got yourself a boyfriend yet?”

You decide to dodge his questions with a joke. “Nup I don’t need to, I hear so much about you and your boyfriend and your ‘couple stuff’ that i don’t need one of my own”

That promptly shuts him up, skin flushing with a slight rash as he averts you gaze. He doesn’t bring it up again for the rest of the week.

 

Your laptop closes with a snap before you’re carefully sliding back into its bag, securing it with the black Velcro straps. You decided to pull an all afternoon study session at the UNI to catch up on the work that you haven’t managed to get done. You have to pick Jen up at 11:30 so you thought you might as well get something productive done while you wait for her. You’ve got about 20 minutes before she finishes work so you’re scrambling to pack up and get to your car.

The UNI is good to study in at night because everyone is quiet and focussing on their own studies and as long as you bring snacks you’re set for the night. The only downside is having to walk in the dark to your car. Sure they have lamps lighting up the pathway towards the car park but you’re surrounded by trees in an open area and the lights do little to light anything that isn’t the path.

You’re never really concerned about it though, usually humming all the way until you unlock your car and blast the music. Tonight starts off no different; you’re walking down the pathway humming along to the music playing through your earphones as you cross the metal bridge. You’re halfway there and you can see your car up ahead when you notice that instead of there just being your shadow, there’s two.

You scream.

Yanking your earphones out, you whip around expecting to face a random stranger when you stare back into nothingness. You frantically search around through the dark for another person, wanting to see the attack coming head on, if there is one. Your heart is still trying to escape your chest as you scan the surrounding area. You’re the only one there. After waiting in silence, body tensed, you realise that nothing is going to happen so you slowly make your way back to your car, eyes still searching before looking back down at the path.

There is only one shadow.

 

You’re still on edge for the next few days, making sure you’re at home before nightfall. You’re trying to tell yourself that you saw wrong and want to laugh for screaming like an idiot but it’s still in the back of your mind that it could have really happened. You’re not paying attention to where you’re walking so you walk face first into a denim clad chest. Flustered you pushback ready to apologise when you realise who it is. Tall, Dark and Handsome is staring so intensely at you that you are frozen to the spot. You can see his nostrils flaring as he steps closer to you, heat burning in his eyes. You quickly yank yourself away before he can get any closer and streak out the exit.

You can see Phoebe up ahead standing with Scott and a couple of the other boys and you let out the breath that you have been holding in when a large hand grips your forearm and spins you around. You struggle, trying to get as much distance between you and Tall, Dark and Handsome as you possibly can when he growls “Stop running away from me!”  
His deep voice shocks you and you’re paralysed, mind running a hundred miles per hour. You can see Phoebe staring on in horror as Scott and Luke stride towards you “What are you doing you loser?”

The iron grips tries to tug you away but you plant your feet firmly to the ground in protest “Let go of me! What do you think you’re doing? Stop it!”

You see his dark eyes flash up towards your classmates who are almost upon you before flicking his eyes back down to stare at your terrified face. He grits his teeth and growls out a ragged “You’re mine” before forcefully pulling you into him, situating his face between where your neck meets your shoulder. You have a split second of panic before pain floods your body at the sudden sharp sting of teeth on your skin. You’re still screaming as your classmates manage to wrestle the surprisingly strong male off of you, pushing him away as you fall to your knees in the corridor. You’re still gasping in shock as your hand cups the wound on your shoulder.

“HE BIT ME!!!”


	4. Panic

“Can I just get you to push your hair aside so I can inspect the wound?” the doctor asks as you’re sitting on the hospital bed.

Silently you push back your hair and allow the doctor to get closer. Phoebe is standing behind you, rubbing your back in an attempt to comfort you. You’re still in shock, mind flitting past the events that occurred not 30 minutes again.

The boys had managed to push the guy off of you and prevented him from making another move towards you. You had knelt there on your knees, Phoebe screaming beside you asking if you’re ok but all you could do was stare back at the man that attacked you. He was hissing and snarling trying to get to you but you could tell he was holding back, you found it odd that he wouldn’t force his way through Scott and Luke. You could see him calculating his next move, body tensed and waiting but he jerked back and went on the defence when he saw the security guards rushing forwards. He shot you one last desperate look before taking off, cutting across the path and towards the car park.

“Jess, it’s gonna be ok. He’s gone.” Phoebe sobs as she urges you to your feet

“What a freak! You ok dude?” Luke pants breathlessly while attempting to pull your hand aside.

This brings your mind back into focus and you push his hand away. “I’m ok, just a bit shaken up. It’s just a scratch”

“Scratch or not, I’m taking you to the emergency room” Phoebe insists, taking you by the elbow gently and leading you towards her car.

 

The doctor presses against the mark on your neck and you hiss in pain, muscles sore and tender from the bite. “Well it hasn’t broken skin so that’s a good thing but there will be a nasty bruise for a while.”

You sigh in relief, “How bad is the bruise?” you ask

“She’s a beauty. So how did you manage to get yourself bitten?”

Your temper flares up, “I didn’t stick my neck out and ask to be bitten!” the doctor flinches at your raised voice. “I was walking to class and this random guy wouldn’t leave me alone and then he bit me”

“Did you know this man?” the doctor asks pulling out your file.

Phoebe pipes up from beside you. “We don’t know him but he’s been following Jess around for about three weeks and being all creepy like”

The doctor fixes you with questioning gaze before saying slowly “I’ll like to take some swabs of your neck for some testing. You haven’t washed the area have you?”

You look puzzled. What sort of testing? “Umm no. we came straight here, I didn’t even think about washing it.”

“Good. Make yourself comfortable while I go get one of the nurses, won’t be long.”

Phoebe and you share a look. “What testing can he possibly do?” she asks.

“Beats me. I just want to go home. I’m exhausted.”

She rests her hand on your shoulder giving you a squeeze in reassurance as the doctor comes back with one of the nurses. She is one of the most gorgeous women you have ever seen and you’re suddenly very self-conscious about your appearance. Her lips split open to give you a dazzling smile. 

“Hi jess, I’m Sophie. I just want to take a quick look at your neck” she says as she pulls up a stool and sits down.

Cool fingers press against your throat as she presses here and there murmuring to herself under her breath. Pulling back, she gives you another smile as she reaches for a vial and swab unscrewing the cap and laying the items out on the stainless steel bench. She wets the tip of the bud with a solution squeezed from a tiny bottle and then makes quick work of running the cotton tip thoroughly and swiftly over your neck. You skin feels damp and cool as she pulls away, placing the stick back into the vial securing the lid and giving it a quick shake.

“We will just have to wait a few moments for the results to show. Now, is there anywhere else that we need to attend to?”

Your knees are throbbing from where you hit the cement but you don’t think you need medical attention for grazed knees. You have other important things to deal with. “What are we testing for?”

“Oh it’s nothing serious, it’s just to see whether it could possibly get infected”

You glance at the vial to your left curiously. There’s a beat of silence.

“What does it mean if it turns green?”

You’ve never seen someone react so quickly as the nurse flips around, hand outstretched to grab the vial, vibrant green solution sloshing around inside. The doctor quickly plucks it out of her grasp, holding it up to the light and giving it a good shake. Suddenly he’s wearing a very neutral face as he tells the nurse she can take her leave.

Sophie protests. “I would like to stay if that is ok.”

The doctor fixes her with a stern frown, shaking his head slightly. “No you may go please.”

She reluctantly rises from her position, shuffling over to the curtain and drawing it back. She pauses as if she’s going to say something before her mouth snaps shut and she strides from the area, drawing the curtain back harshly behind her. You can hear her angry heels slapping the hospital corridor fading into the distance.

You quickly forget about her as the doctor leans towards you. “Have you been watching the news recently?”

An ice cold sensation erupts in the pit of your stomach, fear clenching your heart as you realise what the doctor is implying. When he sees that you have caught onto what he is insinuating his gives you a tight smile. “You were bitten by one of the gifted.”

You suck in a harsh breath, mind reeling from the information. “What does this mean?”

“It means, that you have attracted one of their kinds attention and they have tried to mark you…”

“MARK?!?” you had forgotten about Phoebe’s presence until she piped up from behind you. “What do you mean by marked?”

He doctor ignores Phoebe, directing his words at you only. “I have only seen a couple of cases as this situation is very new to the medical field but what we do know is that when one of the gifted finds the one they consider to be their mate, they will give them a bite marking them as theirs. However in the other cases, the skin has always been broken, yours is merely bruised. One can only assume that the bond hasn’t been created properly.”

At the word ‘bond’ you’re about to ask the question when he intercepts and answers for you. “The bond is what happens after the gifted has bit you, tying you to your mate,” you feel nauseous at the word mate and you begin to panic. “I don’t want this! I don’t want to be someone’s thing, something they own. What the hell can I do?”

“This situation is the different from all the others as I said before. I’m going to take an educated guess when I say that the bond hasn’t occurred. The bite and breaking of the skin is vital to allow the saliva to penetrate the bloodstream. You have received a bruise, it hasn’t been done properly.”

You calm down slightly and slowly sit back down, realising that you had jumped up in your panic. You take the time to get your heart back to normal, thinking of all the possibilities. The doctor allows you to think in silence.

“What do I do now?” you ask in a small voice. 

You don’t want to be tied to some random stranger who you don’t know. He gives you an uneasy feeling whenever he is around, you can’t trust him and you want to get as far away from him as possible. He is dangerous, the purpling skin on your neck perfect proof of what he is capable of.

The doctor stands up and walks over to his trolley, snatching up a little booklet and begins to write in cursive handwriting. You realise as he begins talking again that is a prescriptions booklet. “I suggest you try to stay as far away from the young man in order to let the bruise heal and so he won’t be tempted to try again. The longer you stay away from him, the more time your body has to get rid of his influence or scent as they call it. I’m going to issue you with some antibiotics just to give your system a bit of a boost. If you have any concerns come straight back here and we will give you a check-up ok?”

You nod, accepting the yellow slip of paper that he hands you. “I’ll just get you to fill out some extra paperwork and then you’ll be free to go”.

 

You’re walking out of the emergency room behind Phoebe, hand rubbing at the thick padding taped to your neck when you hear your name being called. You look behind you to see the nurse from before following after you. You stop and wait for her to catch up; telling Phoebe you’ll meet her at the car.

“How’s the neck?”

You cannot express your thoughts into words at this point in time so you just shrug your shoulders at her feeling a little twinge. She reaches out to take your hand.

“I know I’m out of place by saying this miss but I urge you to go and speak to the man who gave you that mark.”

You gape at her in shock, yanking your hand from her grasp, putting a few feet between you. She doesn’t move to follow. You just had some strange psycho attack and bite you and she’s telling you to go talk to him? She’s got to be out of her fucking mind. What sort of nurse is she?

“Please, hear him out. It will be better for the both of you. I can assure you he won’t hurt you.” she pleads.

“Yes because he definitely didn’t hurt me when he tried to rip out my jugular. If I go and see him he’ll only finish the job off!” you shoot back sarcastically.

Her face falls in despair, unconsciously reaching out to you.

You snap.

“No! Don’t touch me! I’ve had enough shit for today. I am going home.” You shriek as you leave her behind, rushing towards Phoebe waiting in her car.

The nurse is still standing in the driveway, watching you drive out as you leave the hospital. 

 

“Get a bit frisky on the weekend did we?” Luhan teases, eyeing the bruise that has yet to fade on your neck. It’s been a couple of days since the incident with the ‘gifted’ guy. After you left the hospital on Friday you went straight home and stayed there. You holed yourself up in your room all weekend terrified that if you left the safety of your house that he would find you. You went as far as to cancel English class and call in sick to work, much to your bosses annoyance so you wouldn’t have to step a foot outside your door. However Monday morning means a new week of classes and labs and it was mandatory for you to go otherwise you would fail. You forced yourself out of the dorm at the last minute rushing to UNI and walking into your 8am lab late. The lecturer didn’t comment as you hastily darted in, looking like a wreck. 

You choose to ignore Luhan’s comment, focussing on connecting the Bunsen burner properly.

“You smell different, are you wearing a new perfume?” Luhan tries to start conversation again but much to his dismay you ignore him again.

He finally seems to understand that you don’t want to be bothered and he busies himself with measuring out the proper concentrations of the chemicals you’re using today. The 2 hour lab passes in silence.

 

 

Phoebe finds you after class, rooted to the floor staring at the booth that you always sit at. There’s a large coffee cup from your favourite coffee shop, steam rising out of the exposed lip. The smell of coffee beans penetrates your senses. Phoebe picks up the cup and inspects the sticky note stuck to the side of it in messy handwriting.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you, I just couldn’t control myself. Can we talk?”

“The nerve! He attacks you and then expects you to go and talk to him.” Phoebe spits angrily, throwing the coffee cup into the nearest bin, the sound of liquid bursting out of the cup and spreading throughout the bin liner. “For all we know he’s bloody poisoned it.”

She quickly checks around the area, eyes flitting between each student trying to see whether he is in the room. He’s not there. You’re not safe anymore. He knows where you sit, he knows your favourite coffee shop and what beverage you like, what else does he know?

“Come on, we’ll sit in the library today”

Phoebe says nothing as you sit in the darkened corner at the far end of the library, doing nothing but stare out the window watching the ducks waddle in a line around the pond. There was no avoiding it. He was persistent and you knew he wouldn’t stop until he got you alone. To do what, you didn’t know. All you knew was that he was coming for you and you would be defenceless against him.

What does he want from me?


	5. Never-ending coffee cups

The coffee cups ricochets off the lip of the library bin with a nasty slosh. You curse under your breath rushing to pick up the offending item before it can spew any more of its contents onto the carpet. Phoebe reappears bearing paper towels after having dashed off into the bathroom. The librarian evil eyes you as you attempt to mop up the damage you have inflicted on the worn down threads.

Still grumbling you manage to at least get half of it out of the carpet before slapping the mushy mess into the bin. It makes a satisfying slap.

“Don’t say a word” you hiss at Phoebe as she stumbles along behind you.

Finding a new spot in another area of the library you slump down at the desk, bag flopping awkwardly into the seat beside you.

“He just doesn’t give up!”

You receive no response from your friend. She’s used to it. After almost a week and a half of numerous cups of coffee turning up at places that you usually frequent, more often than not bearing another handwritten post-it note, Phoebe has become accustomed to your rather violent reactions. Tossing this morning’s letter in with the rest of them, you zip up the front of your bag rather harshly as if it’s the bag’s fault for your predicament.

You can tell he’s getting desperate to talk to you, the anger woven into his writing long since disappeared only to be replaced with something akin to grovelling. Pathetic.

You’re angry, no furious! After the attack you were constantly on edge, flinching at shadows and just waiting for something to happen. But nothing did. Like a cat playing with its food before the final blow, it seems that the dog has decided to make a little game out of the situation, toying with you until you finally snap. Trying to intimidate you. Trying to petrify you into submission. It worked for the little while but then you began to see that he wasn’t putting his words into action. His threats were empty and your whole attitude took a sharp 180 degree turn.

 

 

The final straw is in graphics class.

Your lecturer waltzes into the room carting his oversized A2 folder and his sketch plate hindered by the fact that he’s trying to balance both in one hand while attempting to keep the cup in his other hand upright.

Settling all of his belongings onto the desk, he straightens his clothing before turning to face your direction; eyes lightning up in recognition as he finds you in your usual seat. “Jessy!”

Your eyebrows furrow in irritation as he walks over to hand you the cup in his hand. “Your partner caught up with me in the hallway. He asked me to give you this because he was in a rush. Said to study hard and he would see you later”. 

He slightly twitches the coffee in his hands, indicating that you should take it. Having no other option, you accept it feeling repulsed by its very presence, “Do you mind if I quickly go see if he’s still here?”

Phoebe gasps at your request, looking like a stunned mullet. Rory checks his wristwatch and nods swiftly, “You have 5 minutes. Make it quick, otherwise I’ll lock the door and you won’t be let in until the end of the lesson.”

Leaving no room for questioning on Phoebe’s part, you storm from the room, drink clutched tightly in your hot and sweaty palms. Eyeing the hallways you detect no movement and proceed towards the exit, steel frame of the door slamming into the bricks as you stride out into the quad.

 

 

Where the fuck is he?!

Adrenaline flowing through your veins boosting your confidence you scan the area. A few students’ are murmuring amongst themselves, wondering what or who was going to be on the receiving end of your wrath.

Hearing approaching voices you see a large crowd of students’ flooding out of one of the larger lecture halls, senior girls passing you on their way to the canteen. But you’re not paying attention to them; oh no you’re narrowing in on three particular students. Another surge of adrenaline and you’re off, approaching the three student’s in question, halting only when you are within arms range and hurling the coffee cup as hard as you can towards them. The beverage strikes the shortest one fair in the chest, earning a yelp as it explodes all over its victim, scalding his skin. You have no time to feel bad about the hurt and confused look you receive as you get up in his face, feeling a little triumphant as you realise that he’s a few good inches shorter than you so he has to tilt his head up in order to stare into your murderous gaze. The tall lanky boy standing right behind him seems torn between tearing you apart and pushing the smaller boy behind him, if his stormy expression is anything to go by.

Gathering the last remaining courage left in you, you let loose. “Tell your friend that if he isn’t man enough to face me and finish what he started then he can fuck off and leave me alone! Otherwise… he knows where to find me!!!”

Your outburst has gathered several people’s attention resulting in a small crowd slowly surrounding you. You ignore them as you finally acknowledge the third boy off to the side. He’s as tall and lanky as the second boy, silently appraising you. You glare at them long enough for the message to sink in before you turn on your heel heading the opposite way.  
You’ve only taken a few steps before you think of something, quickly whipping around to see them in the exact same position, watching you, only the shortest boy is now holding his sopping wet and cold t-shirt away from his body. You push aside your guilty conscience, snarling “I hope you enjoy your coffee!”

With nothing more to add you push your way through the milling students and back down the hallway to your graphics class. The doors locked when you’re arrived but that’s probably a good thing. You wouldn’t want your classmates to see you like this. Hunched over and trembling you let the floodgates open allowing the hot tears to run down your face in rivulets. Now that the adrenaline rush is gone all that is left is fear.

What have you done?

 

 

“Jess what have you done?!” Phoebe shrieks as you relay what happened after you stormed out of the classroom. “Are you trying to get yourself killed? Because this is a sure fire way of achieving it!!!”

You sniffle, clutching your legs closer to your chest. “I know Phoebs, I just... I was so angry that I just did the first thing that came to mind without actually thinking about the consequences,” You break out into full out sobbing “he really is going to kill me isn’t he?”

Phoebe has no answer to this she just merely holds you as you let your emotions wash over you in the corridor.

 

 

You’re drowning.

Smothered, with no way out.

You’re fighting against darkness as its dragging you under. You’re struggling but it only seems to worsen, the hold around your throat tightening with each frantic tug. Your screams are swallowed by the deafening silence, ice cold seeping into your bones. You give one last desperate jerk before you’re rammed forward into something hard, darkness eating away at your sight.

Consciousness drags you back forcing fresh air into your gasping lungs. Sitting up in your bed you choke on your sobs as you struggle to get a hold of yourself. Your eyes flicker around the room frantically to make sure that you’re the only one in the room. Once it’s been confirmed that you are safe for the moment, you curl back up under the covers in the foetal position in an attempt to combat against any further nightmares.

The grass on campus is frosted over and the pond seems to be evaporating in the presence of the rising sun. Few students are here at this time as you trudge towards the entrance, feet unconsciously dragging you to the white study rooms. You pass the on campus coffee shop; roller door still shut and locked up. It’ll be at least another hour until it opens.

Leaning casually against the chair at the far end of the room, he waits for you. Your heart skips up into your throat at the sight of him, a deadly presence waiting to ensnare you within his trap. A calm and collected aura resonates from within him, taunt muscles flexing under his shirt. He eyes you with his deep brooding stare, daring you to make the first noise.


	6. Confrontation

“That wasn’t very nice you know” he eventually breaks the silence.

You’re a bit confused as this wasn’t what you were expecting. Maybe a growl or a slew of insults. You weren’t exactly expecting him to reprimand you.

“The boys didn’t really appreciate the coffee you gave them, or rather, slugged at them. You owe Baekhyun a new shirt and Chanyeol said to tell you that if you hurt his mate again, regardless of whether you’re mine or not, he will seek revenge.” 

There’s a beat before he changes his tone, murmuring a “Why don’t you sit down?” indicating to the chair beside him.

Not wanting to anger him when you can’t read exactly where he is going with this you pull out a chair and silently sit down. His eyes flash in annoyance when you choose the chair furthest from him. He chooses not to comment.

“You’re one lucky girl you know that? Had you have been anyone else, Sehun would’ve ripped out your internal organs and left you for dead.” 

The third boy from yesterday appears in your mind, ugly scowl gracing his features, knuckles deathly white as he clenched them at his side all self-control going into not smacking you across the face. You shudder at the memory again berating yourself for being so goddamn stupid yesterday.

“Why?”

The soft spoken sound is out of your mouth before you even comprehend what you’re doing. He relaxes back into his chair, arms going slack on the table in front of him. He has the power in this situation and he knows it. He takes sick satisfaction in the fact that you are accepting his dominance.

“I’m afraid you’ll have to be more specific”

Clearing your throat with a nasty gurgle you didn’t realise how thirsty you were until now. “Why me? Why did you…” you trail off, gaze lifting to look at him to gauge his reaction. 

He’s silently waiting, “…Bite me?” you finish.

“Are you aware of my nature? What I am?” he questions.

You nod. You don’t want to say the words out loud, still not believing that is situation could be happening.

“Then you should know why I bit you. The doctor explained it all didn’t he?” Sarcasm dripping from his words.

“Wait, you followed me to the hospital?!” you ask amazed. A spark of irritation ignites deep within your stomach. “How long were you there? The whole time?”

“Long enough to realise that I messed up” he spits, seemingly angry at himself. The thought crosses your mind that maybe he is regretting it or maybe he’s realised that he bit the wrong person.

All possible scenarios are shut down abruptly.

“I didn’t bite you hard enough”

Fists clenched and head raised in defiance. “Cut that out!!!”

He doesn’t seem fazed “get used to it”

“No! I shouldn’t have to get used to it. You don’t own me, I am a human being you can’t own me!”

“Once I properly mark you, you won’t have any reason to believe that.”

Anger flaring you lean forward towards him, jabbing your forefinger in his direction. “You will not be touching me. Ever! I don’t want this. You’re a sadistic bastard who expects people to just bend to his will. I’m telling you right now, I will never submit to you and I will never belong to you. I don’t even know your nam…” you’re cut off with a gasp as within seconds he launches out of his chair in anger. 

He moves faster than humanly possible, making you back up in terror. He follows through until your back hits the wall and his arms barricade you in against it leaving you no room to break free. You’re trapped and feeling on the verge of a panic attack, only able to stare ahead at his throat and protruding collarbones. You feel his warm breath brushing over the top of your head. Guilt suddenly wells up inside of you as you realise that the poor boy that you tried to intimidate yesterday with your height difference must have felt like this as you towered over him.

“Jongin.”

You blink, “What?” Breathing has definitely become harder as he presses you into the wall.

“My name. It’s Jongin”

“… So you are Korean”

He seems slightly amused as he tilts his head down to look at you properly. That doesn’t mean however that he still isn’t incredibly menacing. “And you’re Australian. Does stating that out loud make you feel better about this situation?”

He receives no answer. You shut your eyes hoping that he will just disappear but the warm breath still caressing your cheek indicates that he is closer than he was before. Gentle little tugs at the end of your hair and you know without seeing that he is playing with it. Jongin can hear you heart pumping erratically, throat choked up and blood thrumming through your ear canals. He studies your face from the peaked cowlicks of your hair trailing down to your long lashes fluttering slightly against your cheek. His eyes burn a path over your small nose halting on the small stone embedded in the flesh before stopping at your lips, teeth worrying the bottom lip between them. His desire burns through his ribcage begging him to take you and make you his but he merely presses himself against you one last time before making his way back to his chair. Your eyes flick open when the pressure disappears. Jongin seems to have regained his earlier calm posture but you stay firmly plastered against the wall finding it difficult to breathe.

“So how are we going to do this Jessica? Are you going to continue to run from me or are you going to be a good girl and accept me? I will have you either way, it’s up to you. I enjoy a good chase”

Your breath stutters, “I don’t know you”

“Because you keep rejecting me you stupid girl” he hisses exasperatedly feeling like he’s back to square one. “You have no choice”.

Shaking your head as you deny it. “You said so yourself, You didn’t do it properly. I know the bond wasn’t created. Why can’t you go find someone else? Someone who actually wants this?”

“It’s not that simple. The longer you refuse me and reject our bond, the worse it’s going to get for us. It’s started already hasn’t it? Headaches. Nightmares. Do you really want to put yourself through more pain?”

You’re trembling against the wall hurriedly blinking back a wave of fresh hot tears. You feel utterly powerless in his presence and everything in your body is telling you to submit, to put yourself out of your misery but something is holding you back.

“You hurt me… you bit me and, you hurt me. You’re hurting me right now doing this. I can’t handle it, you’re going at it like a bull at a gate not even thinking about how I feel. Up until a couple of months ago I didn’t even know people like you existed and now I find myself swamped in all this new information and all I can think about is how I will no longer have any control over my life and I’m meant to listen to everything a complete stranger says and just accept it? I can’t take it.”

Jongin is stunned, watching his future mate break apart like this in front of him. He moves to get closer to you but is stopped when you jerk further up the wall more tears spilling down your red face. “What do you want me to do?” he asks in despair. “It’s all new to me as well, I’m just doing what my instincts are telling me.” You can tell his façade is slowly crumbling along with the mask he puts up.

“Well you need to stop. All of it. The stalking, the coffee, turning up in random places, sneaking up on me and scaring me. You can’t just expect me to accept this overnight. I need time.”

For the first time since you met him Jongin looks panicked, fear streaking across his face. It makes him feel uncomfortable, out of his comfort zone as this was something he had never expected. He grew up being told that he would one day find his mate and when he did, he would bite them and that would be it. No-one told him that it would be this difficult, that there would be resistance. He clears his throat.

“So you’re telling me to wait?”

“I’m telling you I need time, but don’t hold your breath. I might get used to it and understand how everything works but… you’ve scarred me, literally and figuratively. At the end of the day, I don’t know if I could ever accept you.”

Its Jongin’s turn to feel utterly powerless as he combs shaking fingers through his dark hair, unable to look at you as his heart clenches in his chest. It scares you to watch how he’s gone from such a calm and collected person in control of the entire situation to now where he’s been knocked from his position of power writhing around in his seat as if your words are physically hurting him. neither of you say anything as you wait in silence.

He finally stands up, barely bringing himself to look at you as he exits the room swiftly looking completely crestfallen.

“Just make sure you don’t do anything that you’ll regret later” is the last thing he says to you.

Legs unable to support you anymore, you slide down the wall hands furling up in towards you as excruciating pain rips apart your chest. Your agonised, dry heaving sobs are heard echoing through the study rooms, but no one is around to help you pull the pieces of your chest back together.


	7. Confusion

You’re lining up outside the lecture hall later that afternoon feeling dead to the core. A chorus of snickers pass you, several members of the group looking back to smirk at you. Some even go as far as to make howling noises with a few obscene gestures. Phoebe can see that you’re not even paying attention, focus elsewhere. She shrugs her backpack further up onto her shoulder shaking her head at Scott in warning not to come over. He ignores her, as usual.

“I hear you’ve got yourself a dog problem Jess,” this earns him a couple of loud chuckles and he smirks to himself, pleased to be entertaining his friends. “Anything we can do to help?”

Phoebe steps in putting herself in front you even though she’s much smaller than you. She looks up at Scott attempting to express with her eyes what she can’t say aloud. He doesn’t move from his spot wanting for you to acknowledge his presence and take the bait so phoebe grabs the crook of your elbow gently tugging you inside the lecture hall, muttering a soft ‘dumb fuck’ as she passes through your tormentors.

That doesn’t stop him from following behind “you’ve just gotta show the dog who’s boss. Once you show it that you’re gonna stand yer ground it wouldn’t even think about disobeying your orders. If you do it righ’ jess you may end up with a perfectly trained lap dog!”

Your classmates erupt into loud uncontrollable laughter and Scott is practically beaming from all the attention. They only settle down once the lecturer shows up and even then there are still the occasional snickers and a few students’ look back trying to see if they’ve stirred you up enough to get the desired reaction. You’re too far out of it to even realise class has end, leaving Phoebe to encourage you onto your feet and out the door.

 

Phoebe has no idea what to do. The coffee cups have stopped appearing everywhere you go and she hasn’t seen hide nor tail of Jongin (You told her everything before assuming a silent state) or his friends and she feels like she should be at ease now that everything is kind of back to normal. The only thing wrong is that her best friend is completely out of it. The more she looks at you, the worse you seem to get and she hasn’t a clue what is going on inside your head she just wishes you would let her hear your thoughts instead of bottling them up inside your head. All she can do for now is wait until you’re ready.

The past week has passed insanely slow and you’re really hoping that time will speed up so you can take a break from it all. The teasing around campus has stopped and Jongin hasn’t made a single appearance since your conversation in the study room. It’s been odd walking into an empty space still kind of expecting to see something waiting for you there. Your stomach grumbles loudly signalling to you for the fifth time in an hour that it needs sustenance. you look through the glass to see who you can only presume is Chanyeol as he makes his way across the bridge, arm slung around the smaller form of Baekhyun, tucking the dainty male closer into his chest as they walk away from the building. You slug it out for another half an hour after that; afraid to venture outside in case they lingered longer than expected.

 

It’s dusk time when you eventually pack up in silence and winding your way downstairs and outside. Goosebumps rise up all over your skin at the slight chill in the air and you tug your jacket closer to take a bit of the edge off. The sun sets fast, lamp lights flickering on in the car park as you reach your car shifting your laptop and textbooks into one hand so you have unhindered access to the drivers’ door with the other. Sliding into the front seat you slip the key into the ignition and receiving a spluttered jerky groan for you efforts. Trying again you’re met with the same result. Popping the hood up you walk round to the front of the car to pull the hood all the way up, fumbling in the darkness for the steel rod to prop the heavy metal up. Squinting into the engine cavity of your car you’re searching for the source of the problem when the hood suddenly gives way, metal pole uselessly falling away as the hood plummets clipping your forehead on the way down when you don’t react fast enough.

With a yell you hit the asphalt elbow first clamping your hand to the gaping gash as hard as you can. You hear rushed movement off to the side of you but are unable to identify who it is through the hot blurry tears clouding your vision. Gentle hands reach out for you one cupping the back of your neck in support and the other reaching up to take your slightly bloodied hand and pull it away from your face.

“I’m sorry. I know you told me to stay away but I’ll be gone once I help you.” the low tenor voice washes over you calmingly and you relax. It’s Jongin.

“This will sting a bit but it will help” he says before something wet and probing licks inside your cut. You hiss in pain, realisation ebbing into your consciousness through the pain that it’s his tongue. He’s licking your wound.

Little whimpers erupt in your throat as you try to pry yourself away from his grasp. He shushes you softly left hand stroking through your hair, playing with the strands between his fingers. You feel completely warm within his hands and he continues seeing to your forehead wet appendage flicking here and there. Once Jongin is confident that your wound is clean enough to heal properly he pulls away, staring at you intensely for a few seconds before pushing up with his legs so he’s standing. He leaves you sitting upright against the car and leans in to pop the hood again, making sure that it is properly propped up this time when he inspects it himself. It doesn’t take long before he’s turning the key in the ignition and the car is roaring to life, purring under his touch.

“It should be ok now. You might need to put some more oil in it later though; it’s looking kind of low.”

Awkward silence envelopes you both as you stare at each other. Deep sad lines are tugging at the corners of his mouth worsening now that he’s got nothing to focus on. You accept the helping hand he offers you and he tugs up and eases you back down into the car, quickly dropping your hand once you’re seated.

Jongin rests one hand on the roof of your car and the other holding open the door as he leans down to look into the vehicle; face softening as he takes in your frightened gaze. 

“Make sure you eat. Please. Otherwise you’ll lose your strength and won’t be able to study properly.”

You feel a sense of guilt and pity well up inside of you watching his face fall as he resigns himself to the fact that you’re not going to say anything. You want to say thank you. But will saying thank you make the situation better or worse? You don’t want him to take it as a sign of you accepting his… ‘Bond’. For all you know he could be playing up the sad and sorrowful act in order to get you to change your mind. You never find out whether you would have apologised or continued to stay silent because Jongin closes the door to your car and is jogging off, the cover of night quickly covering his form.

 

 

“That boy has more mood swings than a teenage girl! He goes from stalkerish to agro to sad kicked puppy, sorry no pun intended but I just don’t get it jess!” Phoebe rambles on.

“I know Phoebs, it’s strange. I told him to give me time and he is, but when he does things like that it makes me feel like a complete bitch treating him the way I have, especially with how he helped me last night.”

Phoebe’s nose scrunches up involuntarily. “Yea but I still draw the line at the whole head licking thing, that shits just way too personal. I don’t think I’d even let henry lick my head. That’s pretty sick.”

“Yea well Henry isn’t gifted. You should’ve seen it last night Phoebes, it needed stitches. I woke up this morning and it was a really thin line and even now it only looks like a kitten took a swipe at me when I got too close. I’m not defending him. I’m just saying that he could have chosen not to do that”

“Yea but you also told him to leave you alone and not touch you and he didn’t listen did he?” Phoebe retorts.

You sigh in defeat, pushing the piece of chicken around on your plate as you contemplate how to best form what was in your head into words that your friend could understand. 

“I’m torn. I don’t want to go there with him purely because he believes that I’m his mate based on so called instincts, he hasn’t even bothered to get to know me just outright claiming that I am his. He wouldn’t even look at me if it wasn’t for this so-called bond how the hell would we be able to be in relationship based on that? So I reject him and try everything to keep him away from me and then I feel like the worst person on the planet for hurting him, it’s so goddamn hard looking at his depressed face knowing that I’m the reason for it. He has got a caring side and he can be soft and gentle but who’s to say that it isn’t an act or that he is the way he is because of this ‘bond’? See why I’m so confused?! This whole situation just keeps going round and round in circles and it’s making me nauseous”

“I can’t answer that for you jess, I really can’t. I’ve never been in that situation before. What is suggest is that you take the time to calm down and when you’re thinking about the situation rationally, and then make a decision. You have to look at it in terms of the bigger picture, if you are mates and you are going to be together for a long time you need to determine whether he’s suitable for you or not.”

“Phoebs I don’t want to marry the guy this is what I’m trying to say,” you say exasperatedly “the whole situation is like, you’re mates? Ok! Stuck together for life! What happened to dating and learning about one another? I’m not going to get into something when I don’t know the outcome and I am certainly not thinking about marriage. So I’m deciding here and now that I am not going to be a part of it and I’m going to tell him no.”

Satisfied with your decision you feel the heavy weights lift off your shoulders but your stomach still feels like it’s trying to pull you down through the second floor of the student commons.

 

There’s a knock on the kitchen door and you yell a quick ‘come in’ unable to answer lest you want to smear seasoning all over the place. Sweet little old Peggy totters in with her walking frame and you ditch the roast potatoes so you can quickly wash your hands and hold the door wide for her. She grins up at you cheekily from behind her thin frame glasses, wispy tufts of white hair sticking up randomly around her small head.

“Hey Peggy, how are you? You been behaving?”

Peggy chuckles cutely as she reaches down to open up the little compartment in her walker. “Oh course I have dear. I’m always on my best behaviour, especially on Sunday. My favourite chef works on Sunday.”

You giggle as she rummages through her little tray smiling brightly and holding up a little glass jam jar and shaking it about excitedly “I had a bit of time on my hands and I thought I’d make you some of my homemade jam seeing as you liked it so much last time.”

You accept the jam graciously, “Naww Peggy you didn’t have to do that but thank you so much! I know what I’ll be having on my toast for breakfast tomorrow”

The seat on her walker goes back down with a shaky hand guiding it before its owner grasps the handles of the walker again. “Did you need any help love?” she asks. She’s absolutely adorable.

“No thank you Peggy I got it all under control, I just want you to enjoy lunch and tell me whether it’s good enough or not” you laugh.

“Oh sweety I’m sure it’s fine, it always is.”

The little old woman seems to stop then, slowly searching your face eyelids opening and closing slowly. “You look different dear” she states as she peers up into your face. “Is it a man?” she asks rather bluntly.

Unable to form an appropriate response you simply gawk at her, a dying walrus noise wrenching itself out of your voice box.

The older lady gets excited thinking she’s on the right track. “Oh Jessy, is he handsome?”

“Oh no Peggy,” you stutter, “It’s nothing like that”

She hums in thought, “so it’s not like that yet is it? Don’t wait around for it honey it could be gone, it’s the twenty first century and you youngster have more freedom than we did back in my day. It’s quite normal for a lady to ask a potential suitor out”

“Ah no… he’s not for me”

Peggy gives you a pitying face before pressing on. “Why not honey? Doesn’t he treat you well?”

“Well he’s a bit rough,” you start, unconsciously rubbing the still bruised skin on your neck, “and he scares me most of the time. He’s a bit wild so I don’t know what to expect from him.”

The older woman gives a warm hearted laugh, whole face showing fondness towards you. “But honey that’s the fun part!” your jaw drops open wider in shock “The wild ones are the best kind.”

A scarlet flush rises across the skin of your neck and up to your ears hoping she was insinuating what you thought she was. You really didn’t need the thoughts. The urge to tell her why this situation was such a bad idea was so strong but you didn’t want to risk scaring her lest she not come she you during your shift. You only work as a chef on Sundays at the retirement village and you absolutely love it, you adore the residents and you love listening to all their stories and little witty comments they share with you. You’d hate the thought of losing little Peggy’s smile and company.

Instead you say the safest thing you can think of, and the only thing you’ve been repeating over and over for the last 8 days. “I don’t know him” (I know guys I’m getting sick of writing this line myself, but jess is adamant!)

The older lady fixes you with a stern gaze, hands on hips as she scolds you using your full name. You knew shit turned serious pretty quickly when people used your full name hence the fact you preferred to be called Jess or Jessy.

“That is what love is all about my dear. When I was young you courted a few times and then you got married, it was that simple. You grew to love and know each other and it was a beautiful thing. You can’t keep holding yourself back in life thinking that you are going to get hurt, you fall off that saddle honey and you get straight back up on it! Go for it! Don’t let some other woman get him! Hang on to him.”

You nod quickly still flushing. Wow if only Peggy knew.

She nods to herself with a knowing look before pulling her walking frame back towards her, preparing to turn around.

“Well I had better let you get back to work Jessy, the others will be grumbling if I hold you up.” And with that she waddles back out the way she came and you’re standing there watching the door swing back and forth on its hinges. It isn’t until you hear the gravy boiling over that you snap back into work mode, hurriedly shuffling over to switch off the hot plate.


	8. At Breaking Point

“You look like shit,” Luhan states bluntly during your next lab.

Your roll your eyes at his forwardness, plucking the test tube of orange juice out of his hand to eye the sediment forming at the bottom. You avoid eye contact with him as you inspect the liquid. “I’m starting to think that it’s your goal in life to lower my self-esteem. How many times in the last month have you insulted my looks?”

The blonde laughs rather loudly earning him a look from the people around you. He doesn’t seem fazed at all by the attention and continues to express his amusement until it dies down into quiet little chuckles. He lets the silence settle again but it isn’t long before he’s opening his mouth again to add more.

“I’m serious though jess, you don’t seem yourself. You seem strung up and stressed all the time.”

“It’s the middle of the session Lu, I have assignments due left right and centre and I have to put up with you on a near daily basis so of course I’m going to look stressed” you tease back at him.

He sticks his tongue out playfully, nudging you to the side so he can reach the line of beakers. “In all seriousness Jessy, you do look really sick, like you haven’t slept in a while. You look like you’ve lost weight too.”

“Must be my amazing dieting and gym routine paying off” you lie

He doesn’t seem to find it funny and the smile slips right off his face. “Jessica. Seriously what’s going on? I’ve ignored it a few times thinking it was just a flu or something but you keep looking worse. I want to help.”

You feel guilty for locking this boy out of your life, he trusted you enough to tell you all his secrets and concerns and when he’s trying to be a good friend, you shut him out. You try to tell yourself that this is for the better.

“It’s ok dude, I’m fine. Yes I haven’t been sleeping well but it’s not because I’m sick. I’m just trying to keep up with all these assignments; they’re really draining my energy. I promise it’ll get better soon.”

You can tell he doesn’t believe you. He’s not even trying to look like he’s working now just outright staring at you, eyes silently pleading with you to tell the real truth. His efforts are all in vain, you’re not budging.

He sighs loudly, admitting defeat scruffing his immaculate hair up in frustration. “Alright. But you know I’m here if you ever need me, if you need someone to talk to about anything” he says emphasising on the last word. 

You don’t like his tone as if he’s hinting that he knows more than he’s letting on. “Just so you know, if it gets any worse and you make me worry anymore, I am tying you down and dragging you to the hospital, comprende?”

You grin at him, “Savvy.”

 

 

Your good mood plummets drastically when you spy the last person you wanted to see out the front of your next class, supposedly waiting for you. Jongin is leaning up against the brick wall, hands in his pockets staring out into the courtyard. He’s wearing low sweatpants and an oversized hoodie, a strange change from his usual denim jeans and t-shirts. He seems oddly smaller than usual which you can’t fathom why, people don’t shrink. You have to hold in your shock when his head turns towards you when he senses your approach. He looks tired. His face is all drawn in dark eye bags standing out stronger against his sickly skin colour. His mouth tightens when you stop in your tracks not getting any closer and you focus in on the ashy hue of his dry and cracked lips.

Scott passes between you doing an impression of a whimpering puppy before sneering out a “Good little lapdog” before disappearing into the classroom.

Jongin gives no indication of acknowledgement of the other male, all of his fight seeming to have left him. You slam a wall up, not wanting to show him how bad you feel seeing him in this state.

He’s the one to speak first. “Jessica, we need to talk.”

You immediately go on the defence not ready for this. You were still going to stick by your decision to tell him no but this is not how you wanted to do it. Especially when he looks so ragged.

“Jongin, don’t. Not now.”

He grabs your wrist weakly trying to pull you back to him as you go to make your way into the classroom. “How much more time do you need?”

“I haven’t got time for this right now, I have class. It can wait. I’m sorry but I have to go” you say as you twist your arm free of his loose hold and Jongin doesn’t even try to hold you back letting you walk away and through the door.

Jongin stands awkwardly outside the learning space breath coming in harsh pants as another wave of hurt zaps through him. He promises himself that he will find you again after class. He really can’t force himself to wait any longer.

 

 

You avoid him. You see him several times out the corner of your eye and he spots you and starts to make his way over but every time you take off, weaving your way through corridors and people successfully evading him each time. It hurts each and every time and you have no idea why. Your emotions are all over the shop worse than when you’re pmsing. One minute you want to yell and scream and hit things and then the next second you’re finding yourself hurt and scared without a clue as to what’s going on. You’ve already told phoebe to give you space today not wanting to go off at the poor girl more than you already have. Until you can figure out what is wrong with you you’re just going to avoid human contact.

Especially Jongin. 

You don’t want to regret losing control. Funny how you’re now concerned with how he feels when he never seemed to show the same consideration of your own feelings. You make it to your car, backing out swiftly before flooring the engine speeding out of the car park swerving around a car that is reversing out of its spot so you don’t have to stop. You watch Jongin’s form shrinking in the distance as he stands there watching you drive away looking completely lost. Jongin grits his teeth in anger, heart clenching painfully and he storms off in the other direction only to stumble down the embankment near the duck pond. Letting himself go he lays here on the cool grass lacking the energy to pick himself up and move.

 

 

You feel yourself surfacing into consciousness, bleary eyes blinking around your darkened room muddled brain trying to work out why you’re awake when you hear the tapping on your window. You freeze instantly hoping that it was just the wind because there is no way that a human can possibly be doing that when you live on the second floor but then the tapping seems to increase in sound and urgency.

You squint at your phone curious as to what time it is, 3:10am. 

The tapping stops and you lay there completely still almost believing and hoping that it has finally ceased when you hear a pleading “Jessica please~” through the thin sheet of glass separating your bedroom from the outside world.

Throwing the covers away from your warm yet aching body you snatch up your discarded pyjama pants up off the floor feeding your limbs through the leg holes before cautiously approaching the window. Peering out between the wall and the crack in the blinds you easily identify Jongin kneeling on the awning using the window to support his weight. You see just how gaunt his face is in the moonlight and how his clothes seen to hang off his thin frame. Gone are the tight muscles on his arm and gone is the puppy fat that used to cling to his cheeks leaving behind just the shell of what Jongin used to be. 

You squash down concern and urge to hold him close; steeling yourself before flinging open the blinds to stare straight into Jongin’s sunken in eyes. He looks hopeful at your appearance finding the energy to find his way to his feet, scratching at the flyscreen. You unlock the latch sliding the window up on its rickety old frame, locking it in place with the wooden pole lying on the window sill.

His thin mouth opens but you halt him in his tracks with a quick hand, silencing him. “No. Go away I don’t want to hear it.”

“It’s important I have to…”

You cut him off quickly making sure to keep your voice low so you don’t disturb Mel in the next room. “I told you, give me time and yet you still continue to pester me. I told you to leave me alone and stop being so creepy and here you are in the middle of the night outside my window like a rapist, NO I AM TALKING!” you hiss as he goes to cut you off. At your raised voice he shuts his mouth again surprisingly obedient. “Nothing is that important that it couldn’t have waited until morning.”

He panics, “You don’t understand, you avoided me! We haven’t got much time left.”

“Don’t start that shit with me! Get a grip. Stop your moping. I avoided you because I didn’t want to do it like this.”

Jongin senses where you are going with this and all his pride is thrown away as he begins to beg, to plead “no please, don’t do this please.”

“It’s not going to work. We can’t Jongin.” His face crumples in pain at your words and attempts to pull himself through the flyscreen to get to you but he isn’t strong enough. You don’t realise you’re crying as well as he gulps and chokes on his own despair. “Go.”

He struggles with the flyscreen violently using the rest of his strength. He has to fight for it. He can’t take no for an answer. You jump away from the window scared at his reaction and he seems more animal than human as he tears at the screen, slashing jagged holes through the mesh. You scream as he almost makes it through and in a last ditch effort you scream.

“No! I don’t want to see you. Don’t you ever come near me again.” Your body convulses strangely as you gasp out your last words. “That’s an order”.

The reaction is instant, all the fight leaves Jongin’s body and he slumps out of your window and hits the rooftop with a bang, sliding down the awning until he’s hanging over the edge precariously. You’re still holding yourself together as you watch him shudder on the awning openly sobbing now. He screams.

The scream pierces through your chest and you can’t breathe, swaying on your feet as you try to stay conscious under the amount of agony you’re in. Through the white noise streaming in your head you hear banging on your bedroom door followed by faint voices. You look one last time outside you window to see that Jongin has disappeared before your legs give way hitting the ground hard as you black out under the pressure.


	9. Small Comforts

You awaken to Mel’s frantic face leaning over you and you register that the pressure on your shoulders is from your dorm-mates hands squeezing and shaking you. Sound starts to flicker back into existence like and old TV that hasn’t been used for a while and you groan, clenching your eyes shut and rolling over onto your side trying to block out Mel’s chatter.

“Steven I think she needs a doctor!”

“No!” you shriek jolting upwards wide awake. You instantly regret moving as your muscles spasm the tingling sensation of pins and needles taking over your body. “I’m fine, I don’t need a doctor. I just tripped and fell.”

Your landlord Steven doesn’t look like he believes you for one second silently looking between your bunched up form on the ground and the shredded remains of the windows flyscreen dancing in the night-time breeze. “So I’m guessing you managed to open the window, cut the mesh all while falling down?”

You grimace as Mel helps you sit up leaning your back against your chest of drawers. “That sounds about it” you grit out.

Mel wants to call you out for your obvious lying but she doesn’t know whether you would appreciate her revealing everything she heard to your landlord. She too had been woken up at the sound of tapping on the glass and she was wide awake and alert listening to you and Jongin in the next room. She’s a little confused about the situation but it sounded like a couple’s spat, one where you crushed the guy’s heart. What she doesn’t get is how he was able to get up onto the roof in the first place and more importantly, where did he run off to after the massive bang on the roof? Did he fall off? You can see Mel’s mind running a hundred miles per hour trying to assemble the pieces of information given to her and coming up empty.

“I’m serious I’m ok, I got up to get a drink and fell over. You know how clumsy I get” you smile wanting to remove the suspicious looks from their faces.

Steven admits defeat with a tilt of his head indicating to your ruined screen. “it’s too early in the morning to do anything about that, I’ll have to get someone around tomorrow afternoon to fix it for you so we’ll be needing entry into your room.”

You wave him off trying to appear casual even though your heart was doing weird flippy things, not settling back down into its normal rhythm. “That’s fine. You have the key so you’ll be able to let yourself in because I’ll be at UNI all day tomorrow”

Steven wants to suggest that maybe you should stay at home and get some rest but after seeing the determination in your eyes to pretend that everything was normal he decided to let you go and do as you wish. “For now maybe just keep it closed and make sure you lock up, I wouldn’t put it past strange folk to see the open window and try to take their chances.”

Mel looks at you at that but you say nothing, lips pressed into a thin line. Steven leaves sometime after that with nothing else he can do to help. Mel insists on dragging you back to her room so she can keep an eye on you. You know it’s useless to protest as the older girl will end up winning the argument anyway. You’re tired and aching and you just want it all to end. You fall asleep back pressed against Mel as she strokes your hair away from your face, murmuring sweet nothings into your ear until you drift off.

 

 

Mel places a steaming bowl of oats and honey in front of you approximately 5 hours later, both of you deciding to give up on sleep when you weren’t able to rest without waking up with panicked yelps.

“Eat up” she says simply wandering back into the kitchen area to finish packing her lunch. 

You feel bad for the girl seeing the way her long blonde hair is still tussled in a messy slept in bun, clothes slightly array from a fitful sleep while the skin under her eyes make her seem paler then she actually is due to the darker colour. You can only imagine what you look like and you turn your nose up picking up the spoon and preparing to eat. You only get 3 mouthfuls in before your racing to the bathroom to bring back up everything you ate yesterday and then some. Mel says nothing as she holds back your hair running soothing circles into your back as your throat heaves and clenches.

 

 

You end up spending the day cooped up in your room bundled up under what you think is every blanket in the house that Mel could find and it’s difficult to move under the weight but you stay complacent, the outside pressure on your body matching the pressure inside. The door is left cracked open so the girls can peek in on you every now and then to see if you need anything. The flyscreen has been replaced and now there is an extra padlock on the frame preventing you from opening the window without the key. It was at your roommate’s insistence that it be placed there as she still felt very bad for lying to Steven and she felt that if she helped protect you a bit better the situation might blow over without anyone getting hurt.

The padlock is a reminder of who you’re keeping out of not only your room but also your life and you wonder what happened to Jongin after he fell on the roof. Did he make it home safely? In the state he was in last night you don’t believe he would have made it that far but no one had mentioned a single thing about a male falling off the roof so you can only assume that he made it.

 

 

You give it three days, hiding away in you room staring blindly at the cream wall waiting for your body to revert back to normal. You’ve barely moved in those few days only leaving the safety of your room to go to the bathroom. You’ve tried to eat and without success as you can’t seem to keep it down, you’re passed being hungry now anyway. By the fourth day the jolting pains haven’t eased in the slightest, still feeling quite breathless and exhausted even when you’re only lying there so you decide that it’s about time to go back to UNI. Mel watches from the threshold as you scramble around searching for you papers and prac equipment.

“I think you should still stay at home”, Mel tries to suggest lightly. She’s been watching you all week, getting Sam and Kylie to take turns when she had to go to work and both of the other girls’ report back exactly what Mel already knows. You’re not getting any better; in fact your condition seems to keep getting worse.

“When was the last time you ate? The last time you slept longer than an hour?”

You try to pass her without answering, pulling the door by its handle behind you as it goes but it won’t budge any further when Mel jams her foot in the opening. She tries to hide her wince.

“I think this is a lot more serious than we originally thought jess. It’s not just me who thinks it either, all of us have watched you take a turn for worse this past month only really getting serious over this last week. I really think you need to see a doctor”

You pull yourself up straighter and plaster a smile on your face in the hopes to appear normal. It hurts to stand, oh my god it hurts. Your muscles are still spasming and tightening not given you a break and you’re using all of your willpower just to stand up.

You pat Mel on the shoulder in what you hope is a reassuring way as you turn to leave “I’m sure I’ll be fine Mel but if it makes you feel any better, I will book an appointment to go see a doctor ok?”

The look on her face tells you that she will be checking in to make sure you actually followed through with your words and you make a mental note to yourself as you slowly edge your way down the stairs that you will have to call the physician’s office later.

 

 

“What no snarky comment this time Lu?” you wheeze out finally falling into your seat. You’re wrecked. The walk from the car park to the lab took its toll on you and its a few minutes until you breathing slows down and your heart is back to that uneven rhythm again.

The amount of concern and worry etched into his youthful face makes you so uncomfortable. He looks at you as if you’re the walking dead. You feel like the walking dead. In an attempt to lighten the mood you try to chirp up and smile at him. It comes out as a grimace.

“How’s Kris?” you ask to divert the situation.

It takes a nudge from you to get Luhan to stop staring at you like his world is being destroyed and once he’s out of his own world he turns away, busying himself with a few loose papers in front of him.

“Yea he’s ok” he mutters.

This raises alarm bells. “Just ok? He doesn’t sound like he’s ok.” You pry knowing that you’re a complete hypocrite wanting the older boy to open up to you about his problems when you yourself can’t even bring yourself to contemplate telling him yours.

Luhan sighs suddenly looking old. “He’s just stressed at the moment. His younger cousin isn’t doing too well.”

“Oh no, I hope he’s ok? It is a he right?”

Luhan nods slightly still avoiding eye contact. “Yea, we’re hoping things work out and that he pulls through.”

You’re shocked. “Oh my god, I didn’t realise it was that bad. I’m so sorry Lu. If there’s anything you need let me know ok?”

Disbelief crosses his face but he quickly smooths it away with a raise of his eyebrows and then he’s finally looking at you. “Thanks jess there’s nothing else that can be done in the meantime, we just have to wait. What I really want though is for you to start taking better care of yourself and go get some help ok?”

You feel really guilty about disregarding your own health when Luhan’s boyfriend could possibly lose his cousin. Kris is a doctor and a good one at that apparently so this situation must be even harder for him knowing that he can’t do anything else to help his family member. Ice clenches your heart and you don’t know whether it’s from your body acting up again or the thought of a poor boy dying. Your vision seems to blur and you go to wipe away your tears but you can’t seem to move your arm. Luhan notices your struggle and rushes around the bench to you. Your air supply is choked off your eyes rolling back and swimming in the darkness and that’s the end of it. A searing pain erupts up the side of your face and you can’t comprehend whether you hit the table or the floor as you collapse in a heap on the tiles.

 

 

You’re warm. Completely warm and cosy cloaked in a warm fur, soothing and familiar scent floating up your nostrils. You snuggle down deeper bringing the warmth closer to you, content on continue sleeping when cool gentle hands cup your face and bring you up out of your cocoon. You whine in agitation but the hands are persistent, continuing to nudge you awake. You glare into Luhan’s slowly appearing face as you blink away the darkness.

“Why~ ‘mph comfy...” you mumble trying to dive back down only to be stopped again.

“come on, up you get,” Luhan’s stern voice orders you before throwing himself out the door, slamming it shut only to walk round to your door and yank it open and it’s only then that you realise that you’re at your house. Confusion bubbles in your mind but you don’t have much time to work out how you got here when all you can see is your friend’s angry face. He is livid.

You decide not to argue and stay silent when he reaches into to gently pull you out of the car his caring actions contrasting against his furious demeanour. The jacket that was wrapped around you falls from your shoulders but Luhan quickly picks it up, swinging it around to settle on your shoulders again. The delicious scent wafts from the coat as he fluffs it and he seems to be searching for your reaction, watching you carefully.

You fumble with the key in the lock before delicate hands are carefully extracting the metal from your grasp and unlocking your stubborn front door in no time.

The taller male has to almost drag you up the steps your arm wrapped around his neck to support your weight and if you didn’t think it could get any worse, it did. By the time you reached the top of the stairs, Mel was standing there waiting for you on the landing not looking pleased by the state you are in. The older girl rushes over to hoist you up on the other side using your free hand.

“Her bedrooms this way” she says as they both drag you the last steps to your door. Mel leaves Luhan to hold you while she swiftly unlocks the door to your room, spreading it wide allowing the boy to lead you in and deposit your boneless body on your bed.

As your body melts in to the mattress it faintly occurs to you that Luhan is silently studying your room, nostrils flaring. He gaze pauses on the window, taking in the padlock and running his fingers lightly down the closed glass before turning to face you, smile back in place.

“Well sweety I have to go, I’ve left your car keys here on the fridge and your car should be fine out the front until morning.”

“How are you getting back to UNI? Do you want me to give you a lift?” Mel asks.

Luhan shrugs the offer off kindly “No thank you, my partner is coming to get me.”

“Thank you again for bringing her back, I’ll take her straight to the doctors in the morning” The blonde girl says as she sees Luhan out.

“Not a problem, make sure you go with her haha then we know whether she actually went” he jokes, mirth not reaching his eyes.

“Lu?” you groan out, pushing the warm fur away from you reluctantly. “Don’t you want your jacket back?”

A funny look crosses his face one you can’t make out, it’s odd and it stays in place as walks back into your room, tugging the jacket back up and tucking it in around you methodically making sure it’s wrapped around you tightly to keep the warmth in.

“Keep it, it’ll help”

And without elaborating about the meaning in those words he strides from the room not looking back. You know he has left the building when you hear the door downstairs slam shut, sound rattling your windows as it echoes its way through the building.

 

Mel sneaks into your room later while you’re passed out to check you temperature and you’re thoroughly consumed by the jacket. It’s the most peaceful she’s seen you sleep in a while so she doesn’t want to disturb you by trying to pull the covers out from under you to give you extra warmth. So she exits the room leaving you to entangle yourself further into the piece of comfort, unconsciously trying to press your face all over it, nuzzling and sniffing at the fur until you settle down once again.


	10. Death.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, I've continued to post the rest of the fic over at AFF if you wish to keep reading just follow the link 
> 
> http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/811559/my-life-is-one-big-stage-romance-supernatural-you-wolf-exo-kai-wolfau
> 
> Hope to see you there :)

“If you just take a seat Dr Asgar will see you shortly. “The receptionist says as you hand her the forms you had to sign in.

Thanking the woman you head back to your seat slowly where Mel is patiently waiting for you, legs crossed and reading the latest cosmopolitan magazine. You slide yourself into the hard plastic chair carefully, not wanting to ignite another fit of small seizures that seem to be a new addition to your condition. Mel watches you and if she didn’t see the flicker of pain across your facial features, she definitely hears it when you groan softly breath coming in harsh pants.

“How long will it take for you to be seen?” she whispers quietly so she doesn’t disturb the other patients.

“Soon” you grimace.

Conversation ceases again and you keep your eyes busy as they roam about the room, taking in the people around you. There’s a lot of elderly people and a few sick kids running around, snot dripping from their nose as they wipe their faces on seats, carpet or their own shirt and you try on to gag in response. Your eyes settle on a young couple in the corner. The woman is slim and gorgeous, long flowing blonde hair perfectly braided down the side of her head and she’s leaning her smooth face against her partner’s shoulder smiling gently in comfort. The man has his own head laying atop the woman’s, eyes crinkled in happiness as he caresses her swollen stomach.

“Jessica?”

You look up to see a dark hair woman dressed in black dress pants and a purple knit patiently waiting for you to acknowledge her presence. You rise to your feet and you notice off to your right the receptionist taking in the whole exchange.

“Claire, Dr Asgar will be attending to the girl momentarily,” she states simply, obviously implying that the other woman is out of place.

Claire smiles back, straight white teeth flashing briefly before her mouth closes. “Dr Asgar is very busy at the moment and I have permission to look at the girl, it doesn’t make a difference really does it?” she turns about to you, indicating you towards he back room with a perfectly manicured hand “If you’d like to come through?”

Mel waits in her seat as you follow the taller woman into her office, door clicking shut and she helps you into the plush chair right in front of her desk. Seating herself across from you she smiles warmly making you feel at ease and she clicks through her computer, looking for your files.

“I hope you don’t mind me intervening but I don’t think Dr Asgar has the training to deal with your type of situation, if you know what I mean?” she chuckles slightly, eyes searching the screen for your name. “So, what can I help you with today?”

“I’ve been feeling really sick lately” you start unsure of where to go next. Apparently she senses your hesitation.

“What symptoms have you had?”

“Umm, vomiting, cramps and pains, unable to sleep umm…. I can’t eat and I’ve been having terrible nightmares.”

Her eyebrows crease in concentration as she types in your conditions. “Oh dear that doesn’t sound very good, the little ones don’t sound like they’re being very nice to mum do they.”

You sit still, not quite sure whether you heard her correctly and she doesn’t seem to notice your confusion as she continues to type away.

“Usually you don’t get nightmares but it can happen, is it your first pregnancy? Because often a lot of stress on the body during this time can result in nightmares. I can … “

“I’m sorry but what?” you cut her off and she finally looks at you. “I’m not pregnant”

Her red mouth opens and shuts a few times and she oddly resembles a fish as she tries to find the right words. “I’m sorry; perhaps I read the situation wrong. I smelt your mate on you and I just assumed from your symptoms that you were pregnant.”

Disbelief washes over you. She could smell your mat… Jongin on you? What the hell? You feel trapped and panic begins to well up inside you. Your distress is very evident and she looks alarmed, pushing back from her desk and coming around to sit beside you.

“Sweetie, whereabouts is your mate?”

“I don’t have a mate” you say, pain flaring up in your joints.

Claire tries again, “its ok, I know. You don’t have to lie, you’re safe here. Would you be able to get him to come down here? I want to speak to you both at the same time if that’s ok?”

You shake your head and you can see the suspicion grow on her face. “You can’t”

She reaches over to take your hand but you pull away before she can so she lets it drop back down between you. You notice when she next speaks that she changed her tone to appear more comforting. “Why can’t you sweetheart?”

You might as well tell her the truth as she doesn’t seem to be the type of person to give up easily. “I sent him away."

“You… sent him away?” she asks slowly and if she wasn’t confused before then she certainly is now. She searches your face as if searching for something that will give her information on your confusing answers when her eyes land on the junction between your neck and shoulder. Her eyes widen impossibly and she darts forward quicker than you thought possible to press cool fingers against your neck, probing the area. It seems that that’s all the information she needs as rushes back to her chair to begin typing furiously into the database.

“Honey I need you to stay calm, we are going to help you but I need to know where your mate is so we can fix this.” She is looking at you now, apparently trying to break the news to you gently despite you already knowing what she is going to say. “The reason why you have been having all these symptoms lately is because your bond hasn’t been formed. You’re not tied to your mate.”

“I know” you state bluntly and the shock that crosses her face is scary. She looks furious.

“You know?!” She questioned, voice raised slightly higher at the end. “Why haven’t you fixed it?”

“I told you, I sent him away. I don’t want to be bonded to him so I said no.”

Her pale hands fly up to press against her face, slowly slipping down in exasperation with a big sigh. She huffs a couple more times before composing herself again. “It doesn’t quite work like that. If he senses that you’re his mate, than you are his mate. There’s no changing it. He can’t just pick another mate.”

“But I don’t want it.”

“I don’t get what you mean when you say you don’t want it.” She looks at you as if you’ve grown a second head, maybe you have. That might explain the sharp pain digging into your skin around that area.

“I don’t know him, how am I meant to be sure we suit each other? I can’t just randomly get together with a guy I never met. For all I know it’s only physical attraction. Surely as a woman you understand where I’m coming from.”

“No. I don’t understand where you’re coming from” she bites and you feel very insecure. Even the doctor who is meant to help you is treating you like you’re the problem, why can’t anyone see your point. 

“Do you know how our kind works? We are very similar to humans only we have advanced capabilities. One of our capabilities is that we can sense when our mate is near, someone who is compatible with us. It’s like a jigsaw but with only two pieces, it only fits with the piece it’s meant to be with. You’re human so you wouldn’t feel this like your mate does but once you’re bonded you will know. He has already scented you as his and his bruise has started your bond but it isn’t enough. The longer it takes the more agony the pair of you are going to be in”

A sense of dread falls over you.

“Now,” she exhales. “Where is your mate?”

You feel so small. Whimpers begin at the base of your throat as you try to hold your sobs in, tears breaking the barrier and cascading down your cheeks.

She asks again, firmer. “Where is your mate?”

“I don’t know. It hurts” you gasp. “Oh my god it hurts!! Make it stop!”

She holds you down against your chair as you begin to thrash, whole body burning and it feels like your skin is being forcibly ripped off in small tendrils.

“There is no other way! You must bond in order to make it stop.”

“No!” you scream, twisting around in her grasp.

“Then the only other way it will stop is when the other ceases to exist.”

The pain lets up slightly and you’re able catch your breath.

“Do you really want that Jessica?”

Gasping out you struggle to stand, barely making it to your feet as the fire comes back. “Why do you act like it’s a matter of life and death?” You ask, panic rushing over you. You really hope your suspicion is wrong.

“Because it is you stupid girl!”

You break away staggering towards the exit, knowing exactly what you have to do even before she screams behind you.

“Jessica, if you don’t go to him now, your mate could die!”

You race through the sitting room not caring who or what you bump into, running past Mel as you sprint as fast as you can over to your car, adrenaline numbing your pain. That’s what he was trying to tell you! You didn’t know and in your attempt to protect yourself you blocked him out. Speeding around the corner you almost side swipe another car, gunning the engine and racing off towards campus.

“Stupid! Stupid! STUPID!!!!” you scream at yourself as you hurtle down the highway.

Jongin was overbearing and he was creepy and all you wanted was for him to leave you alone, that didn’t mean you wanted to die. If you had known the consequences of not bonding you wouldn’t have acted the way you did, he should’ve told you from the start instead of trying to scare you into submission. When he did try to tell you to were too scared to listen!!! Your clenched fist hits the steering wheel in anger and your heart begins to beat very strongly out of rhythm.

Swerving into the car park, you narrowly miss a couple of students, flinging yourself out of your car the moment it stops not even bothering to cull the engine. Racing up the pathway you search frantically around for one of his friends. Desperately you start screaming at the top of your lungs.

People avoid you as you panic before spying the building up ahead and making for it, blood pumping through your veins so hard you feel like you’re going to explode. You burst through the doors interrupting a lecture and that’s when you see the familiar blonde head looking up at you.

“Please help me!” you scream. “It’s Jongin.”

Sehun is suddenly beside you, grasping your hand and yanking you out of the hall. He wastes now time in dragging you away to the exit, moving too fast for your legs and you trip, face and elbows scraping across the concrete on impact when you fall.

“Get up!” He hisses and with his grip still tight on your arm he tries to pull you to your feet, feeling like he’s ripping your shoulder from its socket.

Suddenly there’s a second pair of hands clutching your shoulders and with great strength they bring you to your feet.

“Sehun go start the car, I’ll bring her.” At the sound of Luhan’s voice you look behind you.

Your lab partner is supporting you around the waist as he helps you towards the car that the other boy is currently unlocking. Heart beat increasing in speed and strength you feel like you’re about to pass out when it suddenly stops. All agony dissipates from your body and it’s so quick, it’s like you were in no pain at all.

You scream, realisation dawning on you. “OH MY GOD!!!”

“Shut up and get the fuck in the car” Sehun yells at you, already behind the wheel and revving the engine.

Luhan tries to coax you in the car but your knees give out. “Luhan…”

“Shhh” he shushes you. “It’s going to be ok but we have to move now.”

“No it’s it not Luhan,” You wail in desperation. “I’ve killed Jongin!”


End file.
